“Any lifetime is absurdly short compared to the longevity of memory.”
John Berger
We’ve been clearing my mum’s house. Piles of paraphernalia are pale reminders of her absent being. Papers and diaries filled with her typed words and illegible scribbles. We didn’t know. We occasionally asked, but she kept most of these words to herself.
Her belongings, which aren’t kept or sold, are thrown into a jumbled pile. I pause and look at the detritus. A lump takes hold of my throat. Mum’s life and cares lobbed into a skip.
Death makes hardy souls of us. We have to ruthlessly dispose or burn what others leave behind so we can move on and make space.
Which brings me to the beautiful and serene ‘In Stillness’ by Yumiko Izu. A book of still lives of Saul Leiter’s apartment first made three weeks after his death.
We start by approaching the outside of his apartment block, as Saul would have done many times.
We go inside and see close ups (part in focus and part blurred) of undisturbed trinkets, artefacts and art books. Of dust, cracked plaster and squeezed tubes of paint.
Boxes of film canisters still wrapped in decaying paper. What undeveloped magic is inside?
He is physically absent, but Saul is present in each photo. His scarf still hangs from the back of the chair. An old hat balances on a mannequin on the mantelpiece. His first camera. His signature.
Saul is here. You can feel him. His memories.
Wrapped in tinfoil, letters of love handwritten in Hebrew, German and English between his parents. Photo snippets of himself, his estranged father, his friends and lovers from a younger time.
Long ago.
Still life
In an essay at the end, Pauline Vermare muses on the meaning of still life. In French, it means ‘nature morte,’ or ‘dead nature.’ In Japanese, ‘seibutsuga’ which “… implies quiet and peace... from these still-lifes a feeling emerges that there is still, in fact, still life, and always will be.”
I like the Japanese version.
This is a beautiful, still and intimate book. I doubt a more insightful biography of Saul Leiter will ever be published.
This post is a continuation of the Saul Leiter theme. Last week I shared this:
Continuing on the theme of Still Life, here are Suede giving it their all on Later with Jools Holland in 1994.
My heart goes out to you and your family. I remember the feeling when we cleaned out my dad's apartment after he had passed. It was strange to go through all those things. The only things I kept were a shirt, plastic slippers, and a walking stick. Odd choices, but they were all I needed. I didn't know about the book about Saul Leiter's place. I'm off to spend more money and yet another book.
Beautiful post. Love the video of the Leiter book: truly a peaceful four minutes of mindful viewing. And that Suede song has long been my favourite of theirs. I hope it's bringing back at least as many lovely moments for you as it is sad ones clearing your Mum's place.